bump in the road

i'm left all alone in my thoughts and i suddenly recall this battle within me. struggling. contemplating. a few months back, i felt a small lump in my left breast. i only do random checks as i believed that not having been gifted with an abundant bosom, i have lower risk of tumors, lumps or even that big C. crooked thought right?! hahaha anyways, i was puzzled and a bit alarmed of what it might be. i talked to a friend with a similar situation. she told me to wait for a few weeks after i had my period and check again. i did. but it's still there. i kept on monitoring it. still the same size, i guess. same location. i think that should still be fine right. time went on. 5 months passed. my cousin told me to have it checked. im just too scared. it doesn't seem to grow or change anyways. maybe in time. i just hope and pray that it's nothing that cannot be cured. else, i think my guardian angel should just throw a brick at me, show himself and drag me to the doctor. hahaha

be silent. be still.

i should be forcing myself to sleep. had barely 4 hours last night. nothing very specific in my mind. but i guess the looming event in my life is taking its toll. just when everything should've been right on schedule, unplanned circumstances just pop out. timing is key, i should say. i could stay up all night again, but can i really decide? darn! i feel so unprincipled, weak, fickle-minded! so far, 2 of my 3 consideration points were being "discussed". i'll know in a couple of hours. gahh, here i am, beating the clock again! pati ba naman sa resignation, me pressure?! i feel like im flying 2 equally built kites. i can't hold on to both. i have to let go of one. it's just convenient to have a lot of options, but when they turn you gaga, it's no good.

it feels to good to be needed. to be cited as an asset to the company. but you gotta stop and give room for doubts. all sweet nothings, and eventually, when they've gotten you back in their wings, nothing has changed. aiyahh! i should know my priorities. im just too scared to have no work before quitting. ano ba talaga??! i was talking to the top management people and i felt humbled to be contacted by them.. lil old me. after the chitchat, i felt good and said to myself, maybe i can try the position. and now, writing this entry, imagining my life in pinas.. im beginning to be swayed to just move back. to the left, to the right. which way ar?!

i need a moment of prayer. of silence. of respite. of sleep. it's calling me. hush hush.

janet jackson: number ones in HK

happy hearts' day ALL! and im celebrating it with Janet! wuhoo! it's my first (and probably the last?) time im going to watch a concert here in HK. venue is in HKCEC. first time to go inside too. im just completely in awe at how huget the place is! haha i just go there in the area to tour my visiting friends , near the bauhinia square and watch the fireworks during CNY. inside, HKCEC though, it's really huge. there are a LOT of function rooms, restaurants, halls where concerts/shows can be held simultaneously. as you see, i can't seem to move on yet , venue pa lang. hahahaha

concert was slated to start at 8pm. but crowd just started to pour in at that time. we took an express dinner , este snack lang coz we didnt want to be late. had to leave the office at 6pm to make sure we're on time. show started a few mins before 9pm, ending at 10:30ish. the concert was just AWESOME! given the songs were just amazing, janet still got the moves! lavetttt! it's one big partey! our seats were a bit far but given the size of the hall, im ok with it. at least, our area is elevated compared to those more expensive tickets. they had to stand up all the time. i saw more expats than locals in the crowd. no surprise in that, i guess. the crowd was a bit restrained i think, compared to the YT videos i saw from Manila. haha i miss the rowdiness. but, suffice to say, we enjoyed it. never mind if we're the only ones in our area standing, shouting, singing. heck, we're there to enjoy every minute of the concert!

janet sang all her hits, too bad, i dont know some. haha my faves, and everyone else's : together again, black cat, rhythm nation, miss you much, again, all for you, let's wait awhile, to name a few. i was secretly hoping she'd sing someone to call my lover, everytime, whoops now but to no avail. no encore too. she has very limited spiels. i was "bitin" so to speak but i just try to understand that it must be her age, so she has to set some boundaries too. hehehe she had a lot of dance medleys, 80%. but, then again i thought, what would a few more slow slongs do to her? hahaha aiyahh! this fan just wont give up!

after the concert, it was freezing outside, with drizzle adding to the cold weather. we ate some more and watched on YT the songs we missed. hahaha janet j hangover, i know! it was a fun night! i realized i miss watching live concerts, and grooving to the music. next on my list... michael buble in hkcec? hmm, but too expensive. and too soon. maroon 5 in manila, maybe? let's see...

happy valentines day! love love love!

meeting CnD... i know right?!

eeeeekkk! visited Chico and Delamar in their studio in ortigas. i have been wanting to meet them every time i go home. i just have this difficulty of waking up early especially when in vacay mode. it's just not my style. haha well, for chico and del, i would, i guess.

i woke up a lil before 7.30am, deciding in my half-awake state whether to go or not. after trying to condition myself, and realizing that i wouldn't be able to go back to sleep, i texted my friend to meet me in ortigas and to just do it... off i went. 9.20am, i was waiting in our meeting place while my friend is still in 'roxas boulevard' at that time! 10am, we were on our way, hoping to catch whatever we can. we went inside the building, calmly directed ourselves to the right floor. alighting from the elevator, turn left and there it is. i approached the reception, asked for "chico and del". "pasok lang kayo", the receptionist said. wow, so casual, eh. and there she is.. delamar talking to a guy, not chico. waited for a few minutes coz we didnt want to interrupt. i talked to del then, (feeling close), "hi del, where's chico?" hahaha she asked if we're there for an interview.. i was .."nope, just dropped by to say hi" hehehe maybe thought we're college students for a career interview thingy. we waited inside the booth while chico and del finish their stuff. the radio booth is just a small room that comfortably fits 10 people including the DJs. on-air were rico robles and jude rocha then. chico finally finished his recap and we just talked, chika like old fwends. haha FC talaga! we talked about hmm, about hongkong, CATS and lea salonga, etc. too bad we have to cut it short because there's one group waiting for them. *bummer* oh well, i just handed them some hk souvenirs.

leaving the place, we're still ecstatic. well, i am! hahaha i was amazed at how i breezed through that.. meeting them, the conversation. i thought i wouldn't be able to talk. thankfully, they're approachable and down-to-earth. parang old friends lang, oh. hahaha next time, i will surely drop by... earlier.

POST SCRIPT: of course, i had to befriend chico in facebook.

Manila hostage of HK tourists

it's just all over the news and you can't get by without hearing or watching about it. i was back in pinas when this happened. i didnt know about it until the evening when things turned for the worse. i left for hongkong the day after in the midst of the black travel warning of HK govt to the philippines. on board PAL's delayed flight, i headed straight to the immigration area and easily got through. after baggage claim, i headed to the green lane (no items to declare) but was immediately asked by the officers for another baggage check. it was random, i suppose. i didnt see any one checked before me. didnt bother to look back if there were others who were checked too. i didnt mind coz i had nothing to be afraid of. i took it as a security measure. however, some pinoys became hesitant to travel in HK coz of discrimination which may occur.

there are stories i hear of DHs being terminated coz of this tragedy. some physical violence and discriminatory looks on pinoys. i havent personally proven this though. i know a lot of pinoys here in hk are cautious now. but we shouldn't over sensationalize or become too paranoid. as we don't want to be generalized as troublemakers, let's not do the same to the hongkong people. emotions are high and it's understandable that they vent out their sentiments in a peaceful and respectful manner. we are one, whatever nationality, in condoling with the families of the victims and the whole of hongkong in calling for justice and transparency of what really happened during the 10-hour hostage drama

phil govt may have done a lot of wrong in this situation, but hopefully, the truth will shed some light to the many questions on what actually transpired during the hostage crisis. a lot of bashing, blaming - can't stop that. emotions are high. in the end, philippine police have a lot to improve on. lessons were learned the hard and bloody way, which costed a lot of lives and straining country ties with HK, CHina. thankfully, hk's CE donald tsang also understand the plight of filipinos in hongkong by calling for a more calm and civilized way of handling the situation. we feel your grief, we understand your anger. we will not be judged by wrong acts done by a few.

birthday greets

happy birthday mamuy! aka rosario (RIP)

happy birthday aya! (aka rio rossa)

that's where aya got her name, rio rossa... from rosario. even though mamuy is not here with us anymore, her memories will always live in our hearts.. at times when i really miss her, i talk to her before going to bed. im the eldest grandchild and so i have the most moments with her.

i recall there are mornings in obrero where mamuy would prepare coffee for me coz i wouldnt drink hot choco. the coffee is too hot though so she had to cool it down by pouring it in a large bowl, stir it and blowing on it, and finally transfer it again to the cup. it was just perfect. smooth, creamy, rich taste of coffee with milk. hehehe when our family moved out, we would regularly visit obrero and have lunch/dinner there. on some nights, i would persuade mamuy to cook sinigang sa santol. i didnt know anyone else who cooks sinigang this way. it still has the sour taste and a bit of sweetness to balance the soup. just plain comfort food. =) everytime i would go back to hongkong, she would have this pabaon for me. i had to refuse though to maintain some pride. hahaha but now, mamuy, if you can hear me.. i won't be shy, embarassed anymore.. anything left for me? hahaha

if mamuy was here, i would've gone home and celebrated her birthday with her, with or without a party. every year, coz of mama's nagging, i see to it that im home. now, im thankful she got me to do that. i guess the only regret was not being able to talk to her in her final days. i thought then, that she would come out of whatever she's feeling, like she always does.

~~~ REST IN PEACE, TITA CORY ~~~

7-8-9 = 30

yeppp, today is july 8 2009.

7-8-9.

happy anniversary to mama and papa! 30 years.. and more!

it felt like yesterday when they renewed their vows on their 25th year. my siblings, aunts and uncles TRIED to plan an impromptu renewal of wedding vows in an intimate setting - with close relatives and few friends. didn't realize it turned out to be quite a reunion of their own wedding 25 years ago. we contacted their ninongs, ninangs and entourage. it was simply nostalgic.. uhm, not for me of course.

my wish.. more years together.. maintain the sweetness in spite of the petite fights here and there.. ok?!?!

*hugs*

"michael"

went to kuya j's housewarming one block away from my place. i took it upon myself to bring dessert and make arrangements with the priest. this is actually the second time i contacted father midas. i felt at ease with him.. everyone does in the parish, i believe. he's the parish priest in St. Joseph's Church in central where a lot of Filipinos attend mass. he's an SVD priest - the congregation of St arnold janssen. and of course, our patron in my alma mater - holy spirit. hehehe (ayun, kaya pala... feeling close!) i have always wondered what it would be like to have a priest as a mentor. maybe, i would be closer to God? maybe i would have someone to pray for me? maybe he can give me words of wisdom when my mind is full of crap. hahaha

da King of pOp
news of michael jackson's death still flood the www. all over , you will find the articles, videos reminiscing the life of the king of pop. as MJ once said, “I hope people will look at me also as a person and not just as a personality.” it's such a humble wish for people of great stature. once you reach a point where everyone looks up to you.. somehow you seem to lose that sense of self --- that of being just you, without the adornments of fame and fortune.

***have you noticed some of the great names in history are named michael -- jackson, jordan, schumacher, scofield. hahaha

new macbook pro...

there's a new and improved macbook in the market! the difference with what i bought: it's cheaper, it has SD slot and firewire port, battery life is improved. arghhh. why couldn't i have waited??? why does mac do this in such a short span of time?? i know the difference may not be so obvious but the fact remains that i could have gotten all this, if i only waited for a few months. i pacify myself by thinking that i wont be really using the SD and firewire port. the battery life should be fine. cheaper... uhm, lets not go into that.

goodbye, jacko!

news of michael jackson's death circulated all over this morning. i got mine via SMS. of course i had to double check it on the internet. true enough, the sad news is just sudden, overwhelming. im not a very big fan but i appreciate his songs. his music has really huge following.. same goes with his personal life. i guess, it will be more emo for me whenever i sing "heal the world" in karaoke. hehehe

more on boys over flowers

oh.my. it's junpyo's birthday TODAY! hahaha he's 22 yo. even younger than my brother. kids nowadays are just mature physically.. for their age. hahaha HAPPY BIRTHDAY! i would've liked to greet him in facebook.. but i opted not to. i feel SOOO old already. well, i am. a little. ohh, we're under the same zodiac sign.. i think. i hope to see him in other series or movies. perhaps BOF 2? i know my fwends are having "nosebleed" already due to my never ending rave for BOF and junpyo, so i just indulge here.. in my very own space in WWW.

• woo bin - mafia prince hehehe i like the way he tries to be 'cool'. 
  
• yi jung - looove his instrumental version of "Do you know" when he tries to be the knight in shining armor of ga eul (jan di's friend). though he pretends to be a chickboy, you can tell that there's more to him. 
  
• ji hoo - the quiet, passive F4 member. he has his own mataray ways but once you get close to him, i like it when his expression turn from serious to smiley face. ohh, he looks better in black hair. he can sing and dance too with his boy group.
  
• jun pyo - bad-tempered yet loving leader of the group. i simply adore his ways of showing love for jan di. it may be grand for an ordinary person.. (i wouldn't mind GRAND, extravagant hahaha) but jan di's character is uncomfortable with that kind of treatment. 
  
• jan di - "lucky girl" hahaha in spite of her physical, financial hardships, she is fortunate to have friends and family who love and support her. she is loved by by many and that alone is a treasure that you can't compare with.
• finally, i understood and it's clear that ji hoo has romantic feelings for jan di. in the previous versions, the sentiments of hua ze lei and hanazawa rui were still vague. i cant fully comprehend if it's plain sympathy, or just friendship like that of best friends. in BOF, however, you can tell that ji hoo harbored romance with jan di mwehehehe

this manga already has 3 versions.. i wonder if HK will be next.. or pinas? hmm... hahaha

in mongkok after the acid attack

went to mongkok the other night to accompany my friend buy some stuff.  in the process of course, i got myself a few.  walking in mongkok area made us more paranoid because of the recent events of acid throwing by some still unknown perpetrators.  this, however, didn't dampen our spirits in going from one store, stall to another, looking for some good finds.  true enough, we found (and bought) "essentials" from sephora and sincere. hehehe

in a span of six months, if im not mistaken, there have been 3 cases of the same incident in mongkok.  the police is taking measures from putting up multi million surveillance cameras to increasing the reward for any information that can lead to the suspect.  and just recently, a pinoy family of vacationers also fell victim.  if this continue, hk tourism may be affected.  shoppers in mongkok's ladies market may have to bargain between their safety and a few deals.

hongkong primary, kindergarten, nursery schools close for 2 weeks

hongkong confirmed its first local case of swine flu.  a student in a school in causeway bay contracted the disease locally.  meaning, she has not come in contact with any person who travelled.  so chief exec donald tsang immediately seconded the move of shutting down primary schools for a fortnight.  it's already nearing the end of classes and also with timing, the exams will have to be administered some time.  hongkong, last i know, has 46 confirmed cases... hopefully we can still manage to minimize the spread as much as we can.  

now that WHO already declared pandemic alert, it's best to be cautious, not be lax about our health.  im not saying confine yourself to your room and isolate yourself from the world.  just be safe and be aware, know your body and have yourself checked once signs are showing.  you are not only doing this for yourself but also for the people you come in contact with. 

in the philippines, i read that there "should be no cause for alarm" even when count reached 77.  right... we don't wanna put panic into the minds of the millions of people in our country.  however, when the WHO is the one who will eventually declare pandemic alert in pinas... can DOH still ignore otherwise?? 

when archie marries veronica

huwattt??!?!?!

i grew up with archie and the gang comics. as a kid, i loved the simple yet colorful characters of the riverdale heights students. the classic love triangle with veronice-archie-betty in the lead is endearing because it's like a see-saw of events and you're not sure who archie will fall in love... really. although i felt that he's leaning more to veronica, i still hoped that he'll see much more of betty's inate personality. BUT, now that the makers already sent this teaser.. i guess there should be no more room for hope, eh?

i like veronica.. just not as much as i like betty. especially that ronnie seems to have the world at her feet, rich guys swooning over her, she can have anything she wants. does she really love archie? does archie really love veronica and not just blinded by his own masochism? haha i just pity him when veronica will temporarily dumps him for other guys. will little charming betty stand in the sidelines to see her friends' love for each other be consummated? we'll just have to see when the comics hit newsstands by september (if i got it right).

whatever the ending is, it should be that marriage be celebrated between 2 people who love each other truely, sincerely, unconditionally. who are we to stop true love?

happy birthday

.... R A N I !!!!

to my pretty (and) generous cousin... i wish you all the best.. i hope we get to see each other some day... hahaha you go, i go??? for now, it's nice that we don't lose touch via the numerous social networking sites.  and of course... via the reliable mobile phones... 

speaking... we just talked.. but know that i'm just a phone call away if you need someone to share your thoughts and "life experiences"... just a word of advice "don't drink and drive", okai?!?!

enjoy your vegas birthday and do keep us posted... till i see you again! *mmmmwah*

PS.  dont worry, i'll take care of your resto... *wink*

at work: as caution to H1N1

in the office, we have some precautions to prevent the spread of the swine flu:

• check body temperature everyday upon coming in to work.  there's a designated person to check our temp.  those above the normal temp will have to go home.
  
• there's a mask handy in our first aid kit for people with respiratory problems.
  
• self-quarantine oneself if you've travelled to infected countries.  
  
• if you're sick, DON'T report to work.  go home and have yourself treated by a doctor.
  

OA?  i think, just better safe than sorry.   with the rising number of cases in hongkong, the government thinks it's just a matter of time when the disease will be contracted locally.  i believe that the precautions done in the airport for incoming travelers are enough.  however, due to the common symptoms and incubation period, it's hard to track down all the people an infected person comes in contact with.  imagine if he went to a mall, boarded a public transport, walked along the crowded streets... that would mean, A LOT!  for now, we just have to do our part to take care of ourselves in any way we can.  avoid crowded places when not needed.  

mothers' day

first off...

HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY TO ALL THE MOTHERS

especially those dear to me... mama, my aunts: chit, stelly, vicky, flor, angie (she's like our "mom" for being there for us), my fwends: gewi, vero, borjy, gcel, ate ai, ate caryl, tita harriet.... i could go on and on.. this goes out to all the women, who gave life, risking their own at some point, to let another person see how wonderful our world is... 

to my own mudra.. THANK YOU, even though sometimes, uhm, most of the times when we do talk, our point of conversation is always money,  i know that you're only concerned for my future.  i cannot grasp how you can take other's problems as your own (and pass it on to me.. haha).  maybe it's just your selfless nature.   if i can only confidently tell you to quit working and retire now, i would but i couldnt.  i dont know how our family would be if you dont do what you're doing right now.  someday soon, i'd like to share in your (non-financial haha) responsibility to somehow ease your load.  for now, i only pray that you have enough strength to carry on.  i HEART you, ma! 

H1N1 confirmed case in HK

as of last night, this news struck hongkong pushing swine flu to the emergency alert level.  i guess hk people didnt want to risk any further.  prevention than cure.  it only takes one to spread the disease and once it's carried to more and more people, the harder it is to contain.  there has been precaution on the virus on different levels - national (news, TV), company (memo), even building memos are release.  

"Hong Kong has confirmed its first case of swine flu, Chief Executive Donald Tsang Yam-kuen said.
''We have our first confirmed swine flu case in Hong Kong. He is Mexican,'' Tsang said.
The Mexican arrived yesterday via Shanghai from his home country, Tsang said.
The man checked into Metropark Hotel in Wan Chai before seeking treatment at Ruttonjee Hospital for flu symptoms. He developed a fever in the middle of the night after being warded. 
Tests conducted by both the Department of Health and the University of Hong Kong found he was positive for swine flu. 
He is in stable condition, Tsang said, at Princess Margaret Hospital, the designated facility for any swine flu, or H1N1, cases. 
The hotel has been cordoned off.
''I will raise the alert level from serious to emergency,'' the chief executive said.
Despite putting the city on the highest level of alert, Tsang said all social activities and exhibitions will go ahead as normal and schools will remain open."

wanchai is around 5 MTR stations away from my place, 5-10mins by train.  i would have wanted to hear mass in Central, remit money in western union but that would mean passing by wanchai.  i guess i'll find a nearer Church and shop.  there's this growing paranoia, which i cant shake off , and i won't , just to be on the safer side.  plus, i havent started wearing mask yet.  though i saw people buying them by boxes in dispensaries.  i'll just ask from the office when the need arises.  

off to dubai-4

in dubai......

1 - weather is hot. humid.  and i learned that when it's cold. it's really cold. ergo, weather is extreme.

2 - having your own car is helpful to go around the city.  public transport is only bus or by taxi.  their buses are not so frequent and not that efficient.  they don't have subways or train stations.  it will only be available later this year.

3 - there are no poor locals.  no local holds a blue-collar job.  everytime i see a woman dressed in abaya, i would think, "this girl is rich".  and when i would see a woman covered in abaya from head to foot, face included, i would say to myself "this married woman is rich" hehehe they said that only their husbands can see their faces.

4 - a lot of construction is going on.   i dont know if many were suspended due to the crisis.

5 - even husband and wife are discouraged to be 'affectionate' in public.  no holding hands even.

6 - pakistani men likes boys... nyahahaha

an indoor life-size aquarium inside DUBAI MALL, the biggest (but unfinished) in dubai

sand everywhere.. scenery before our DUNE BASHING...

we had to fill up before THE ride...

articulated bus as means of transport

palm trees?  inside dxb international airport

off to dubai-3

the next days, we joined a tour - DHOW cruise and DESERT safari.  it was Good Friday, and to attend to our duties, we heard mass in the lone Catholic Church in the vicinity - St Mary's Catholic Church.  it was hot and humid and most of all, crowded.  good thing there was this adjacent basketball court to cater to the throngs of people.

the DHOW and ABRA (water taxi) both traverse the dubai creek.  the former is a sailing vessel used by earlier settlers as means of trade (for dates and fish) while the ABRA is a means of transportation to avoid traffic congestion in the major bridges of the city. now, the DHOW is used for tourism to let visitors enjoy the view from the creek. the cruise, which lasts for 2 hours includes dinner with a view.  but, im not sure i enjoyed the food though. hehehe

DESERT safari includes hotel pickup, dune bashing, henna tattooing, abaya photo op, belly dancing show and dinner.  food was better here.  i love the arabic bread and the BBQ chicken. realized i dont have the taste for lamb, mutton BBQ.

our campsite area

i was soooo relieved to finally get to our destination because the DUNE BASHING is taking its toll on me.  after the first half of being tossed left and right, up and down my seat in the car, i felt a bit nauseous already.  the 3 of us rode at the back and even with my seatbelt on, i couldnt stop myself from bumping with others.  it was more than a roller coaster ride, more than i could take! hahaha at least for a theme park ride, it only lasted for a few minutes but this one... takes you on what seems like FOREVER!  i grew quiet as time went, coz im not feeling good anymore.  thank goodness, before i even reached my limit, we reached the campsite.  boy, was i so thankful.  however, i was too drained to even ride the camel (kaya pichur nalang) and try the sheesha.  

during the latter part of dinner, of course there was belly dancing... and more dancing.  i prayed we didnt have to endure that same dune bashing experience coz it was already night time and drivers wouldn't dare under such situation... but no! they still opted for one last hurrah... good thing, it lasted only a minute plus the paved road is actually nearby.  whew!